Time Flies

A reminder..

I always have plans for myself, but they seldom go according to my expectation. I blame myself for that. Sometimes, I just tend to take things for granted and forget how to appreciate them. I’ve wasted my time, opportunity and my parent’s money for so many things I can recall. I hope I can always remind myself to never let these happen again.

Nevertheless, I always have plans for myself. Though sometimes, God will suddenly make something new or prepare a better way for me, I just need to learn how to think wisely before making a decision. How to manage my time, money since I’m going to work soon, as well as how to follow and always stick to my plans with determination to achieve them. I just realize that this is very important, not because I’ve turned 18 this year, but to do things right before I regret.

As I’m moving to a new chapter of my life, I must grow up! And I just made a kinda huge decision after discussing with my parents, that I’m not going to study yet this year. (which is right after I’ve bought the application forms and thought I’ve made up of my mind already) Why? Because surprisingly, (and never thought about it until..) Uncle Phua offered me to work in his company. I think it’s a great idea and opportunity for me to gain some working experience and earn some money before I continue my studies. I can financially cut down some burden of my parents and I’m telling myself, I’m going to work hard for my dream! So I took up his offer, after much consideration and prayers.

I’ve considered this offer as God’s sudden plan for me, so I really hope I’ve made the right decision. I’m sure He’ll guide me no matter what. =)

What a quiet evening..

.. which I seldom experience lol.

My dad’s sleeping in his bedroom, my mum’s sleeping in the living room (in front of the tv as usual, with a big baby pose x,DD), my big brother’s not at home and my second brother’s playing ps in his bedroom. I finally have some quiet moment to update my blog except midnights.

I wonder if you noticed that there are about 10+ posts were suddenly being added a few days back. Well, they’re certainly not being posted by some sort of ghost or something haha, I just shifted some of my writings and personal thoughts from somewhere to here, since I’m closing that somewhere. (you know where *poke Aelyn)

On another note, I was so glad meeting an old friend of mine this morning at church. *poke Kenny. He hasn’t changed much though, except for having a shorter hair. Refreshing back to the days when he was still leading the youth, which is about 6-7 years back then, reminds me that time really flies. Imagine that he’s going to get married soon, becoming someone’s husband, father and grandfather next time. From a young adult, to an adult. From a brother, to an uncle. Wow. Time never stops, and life goes on every single second.

Dad is right. The most precious and priceless thing in life, is life itself. And life is time. Time is money. You can make money if you’ve got the time, but can’t make time no matter how much money you’ve got.

So, try to live everyday to the fullest.
(though it’s not an easy thing to do..)

Styleless self.

When I saw something I like or interested, I try to be that something. For example, Shilin’s Ashen Ray. After I’ve visited her art site, I once tried to make one myself, plus to draw and create a comic like her. It’s obviously impossible because I don’t have a scanner nor a good quality camera for me to upload my drawings and stuff, plus I don’t have the knowledge to create a comic. (but thanks to her, I came across to the graphic community after Manda decided to host my so called art site) Then again, Kim’s Crystal Kiss. I think none of you realized that I was trying to be like her when I still had my Enchanting Echoes. xD

It never stops here though. Next would be Eric’s blog. His blog was the main reason why I choosed to be hosted by blogspot in the first place. And obviously, he had indeed an interesting blog, which made me think that a blog’s layout wasn’t that important anyway. Same goes to Kaede and Aiko’s blogs. I truly envy them for having such a simple and (to me) not so nice layout’s blog, but still making me visit them every time I online. Besides, Yvonne and Khalil’s blogs are making me to post more pictures. I even thought of posting a dizzy video after I saw Khalil’s.

Surprise? I just confessed my sin. xD
Or it’s just a normal thing to do being a human?

Refresh back.

When I look back to my life, I saw I missed out a lot of opportunities that God had given to me. In fact, I didn’t appreciate some of them. Yet, He never stops giving me chance and loving me.. I’m very grateful about it.

But at the same time, I feel regretted. Where’s my determination by then? Where’s my self-control by then? Why couldn’t I sacrifice my time and vitality on something I once wanted so badly, which will actually help me on pursuing my dream?

I’m such a failure. This is what I felt.

Blessed.

I feel blessed in many many ways. And it somehow make me feel that I should be grateful with what I have already and stop asking for more. Which also means that I shouldn’t try to pursue my dream? Or I shouldn’t wish to be with my ture love?

I’m not sure whether this is right or wrong..

Maybe I can choose only one. It’s either my dream comes true, or be able to find my true love. This is what I think. I also think that we shouldn’t be greedy. In fact, we can’t. Because to me, when you receive something, you’ll surely lose something and you definitely can’t have both. This is life. And life is cruel.

But God exists to make our life better.

Yet again, I feel blessed in many many ways since I was born until now. No doubt there’ll be ups and downs in life, but we’ll just have to face them all. And I believe that a smooth and steady life can only make a person weaker, but a tough and rocky life can make a person stronger. And I’m sure sooner or later I’ll find my ways in Him.

Just because He is a loving God.